KEY FOO

Our closest local grocer, Key Foods on Broadway (the D in its sign conspicuously absent at night), has a problem with its image. The aisles are always filled with boxes and clutter, the music sucks, and the whole place generally has this downer vibe like it’s going out of business. It’s a depressing experience and even the checkers are sad and uninspired. They never say hi and are typically rude. Here was one exchange I overheard between a testy checker and old lady in front of me that apparently wasn’t moving fast enough.

Testy Checker (to woman who is putting her change in her purse): Can you hurry it up, there’s other people in line.

Old Lady: Don’t get fresh with me.

Testy Checker: I’m not getting fresh, we have other customers.

It’s the kind of shopping experience I generally loath and I typically go there for a handful of things: eggs, half and half, cleaning products, ass wipe, Canada Dry seltzer and UTZ sour cream and onion potato chips (the best ever).

To top it off they have religious literature in a rack as you exit, as if this place has anything to inspire some sort of conversion besides converting yourself from inside it’s doors to outside as quickly as possible.