Monday, June 04, 2007

FAMILY SWIM II
My previous prescient post about poops in public places unfortunately came true this evening at the Chinatown YMCA. 3/4 of the way through a rather challenging and satisfying working I was doing with my friend Paul, the lifeguards stood blockaded the pool deck showers; hovering and signifying something wasn’t quite right. A few moments later, while Paul and I rested between sets, a woman shows up with a bucket and mop and the guards notify the swimmers everyone has to vacate the pool.

Yes, someone had shit in the showers, and the general impression was that whomever did it had proceeded vacating their bowels while still in the pool, or merely dumped and then got back in the pool, which in either case was phenomenally disgusting as we were potentially swimming around in fecal matter as this must have happened at least ten minutes before they asked us to leave.

Recently someone from the management had posted no fewer than a dozen laser-printed signs around the deck in three languages (English and two Asian) that pronounced “NO SPITTING”: a behavior which I should add I’ve seen from time to time, in addition to plain old nose-blowing action. I asked the lady with the mop if the YMCA had any plans to amend the sign.

“You mean to say “NO SHITTING?” I thought that was a given.”

I told her how I felt that a shit situation was immanent after explaining my previous urinary observation and so she jokingly blamed me for the power of my perspicacious divination. Didn’t take Nostradamus to figure that one out.